Watch your face

I have been told that my face says it all.

Happy πŸ˜ƒ

Sad 😞

Mad 😑

Annoyed 😠

Whatever the emotion, obviously I am an open book.

The 7th cranial nerve controls facial expressions. Mine must be huge! (Info learned from The Good Doctor 3.19.2018)

I’ve never really thought anything about it…..until recently.

Last week I was in a social situation.

A friend came up to me.

This friend said, “I’ve learned to read you and I can tell that you don’t care for ___________ (a persons name entered here)

I was stunned.

The truth is……

The person in question, I’m sure is a nice person. I am sure he/she is a good friend.

My attitude or in this case, facial expression has to do with tardiness and lack of respect. These qualities are not towards me but towards another person. Why do I care? Why should I let something that happens to another bother me?

Disrespecting me or someone around me is a big deal. I just don’t do well with it. I find it rude and unnecessary. Everyone and I mean everyone has a life. Whether it be someone with an important career or a stay at home Mom with babies. You might be a caregiver, or a salesman. You might mow lawns or be a public servant.

The title doesn’t matter. Everyone matters and disrespect is sign of weakness. My opinion of course.

Back peddle………. even if he/she did nothing directly to me, should I have judged him/her on their negative quality? Or should I love them enough to look past the ugly and see the beauty?

I will from now on, watch my attitude and think very carefully about my facial expressions. I want to be more like Christ and not allow my weakness to get the best of me or to be a negative example to those around me. I will learn from lessons brought to my attention. It will remind me get my heart back in place and love the people who are put into my path.

However these expressions will not change

πŸ˜ƒ 😘 πŸ€ͺ

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Eating hard boiled eggs over the sink

I can get easily get overwhelmed.

I don’t have a stressful life…..at all and some days I have zero things on the calendar.

Today however was a full day and it’s currently only 12:47pm

I am taking time from this day to write because reflection on a day like today is important for me to keep things in perspective.

Our son (in law) Justin recently had a death in his family. Justin’s family is our family too and no matter whether we knew the person or not doesn’t matter. It matters that we support and love on the family who has recently had a huge change in their lives.

We are feeding them dinner. Whether or not they are hungry at least it will be there. We recently went through the same life change and were so blessed by those in our lives that fed us.

The day started by taking Courtney and Jack to the pediatrician. Baby Jack had to get immunizations and sometimes just a another person is helpful and truthfully I just like to go and be a part.

Then Lowes and Walmart. Goodness gracious Walmart is like an Olympic sport. However it’s finished and I am home getting ready to start on dinner.

Not really any time for lunch so a hard boiled egg over the sink it is.

I look around my kitchen and geez what a mess.

However when I think of the mess and what it means, it’s really a blessing to have mess.

I am grateful for the amount of groceries I am able to purchase. For our family and for the family we will be serving tonight.

The kitchen floor is littered with baby mats and toys (kitchen stuff as toys is the norm) . I smile when I think of the blessing we have with a baby in our home. He brings such joy and I will step over baby toys anytime.

I look towards my living room and I see paint brushes and an array of home improvement items that we “get to” be involved with. Even that stinkin fireplace that needs to be repaired.

I see the book I am reading and having the opportunity to host a book club with friends. I am grateful for Jen Hatmaker and her talents as a writer. She teaches us ways to be Interrupted.

I see the mileage from Steve for 2017. I am grateful for his job that gives us the life we live. It shows me that I need to finish our taxes too. My ever present bottle of Windex.

As I take a few moments to write my thoughts,Β  I do not want to forget all the blessings we have and that on the days I get to eat hard boiled eggs over the sink, I will be grateful.

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We don’t have to, we get to

In the early months of 2015, we approached my parents about a house we wanted to buy.

Now it wasn’t just any house, it was a great big, really gross, in need of major renovations house.

Would they be interested in moving to a 1000 sf mother in law apartment attached to the big old house? We would renovate and create a space that would be perfect for them. They would be fully functioning in their space with their own kitchen and laundry room. This would mean selling their current home which was a nice home with every amenity they needed or wanted.

They said Yes!

Fast forward to September 2015. The house was ours and we would begin the journey of renovating our 1903 house.

Many long days and nights were spent creating a home for us and during renovations Courtney and Justin decided to get married.

“Where will you live?” The question was spoken out loud a few times during wedding conversations.

“The old house is big enough for us all, if you want to live here.”

They said yes!

House renovations were a family affair. We all had skin in the game.

Courtney and Justin began their lives as husband and wife on the front porch of the old house

Jack William Wissinger was born upstairs in the old house and will soon be celebrating his first birthday…….At the old house.

Mom and Dad lived in the 1000 sf apartment together for 14 months. Dad went to heaven on December 30, 2017. I believe that Dad was probably the most excited about the old house. He worked everyday tirelessly and never complained. He would say during renovation, “I wouldn’t change a thing and I would do it al over again.” Dad took his last breath in the old house.

All of this back story to say, we are a multi-generational household and we do it not because we have to, but because we get to.

In the last few months, there have been some comments made to me in regards to our living arrangements. Good comments!

“I love the dynamics of your household.”

“Your family living together is so cool.”

Yes it is.

However it’s not perfect. 5 adults and baby can get a little crazy sometimes.

Everyone has their quirks.

Probably me the most. It’s a learning experience and patience is necessary. Dishwasher loading has become an Olympic event and don’t even get me started on the kitchen counters.

However, there is always someone to talk to and don’t even get me started when we have company. It’s so fun! Naked girls room is always available for visitors.

There is always a room to hide if you need solitude. A multi-generation house has to have boundaries. There must be a quiet places too.

We eat together most times and there is always Sunday night family dinner. We gave a big table, come on over.

We play together.

We laugh and lately we have cried. Sometimes together and lots of times alone.

We have planned together. Planned what? Who cares! Sometimes it’s a walk to the park and sometimes it’s when we will cook hot dogs over the new fire pit. We have planned a garden this spring.

Our house dynamic has changed since Dad left. We went from 6 to 5 and its just not the same but we are working hard at it. Justin came home with a note for Nana yesterday. He told her how proud he was of her and that he would strive to be as brave as her. She cried……happy tears. We all did. The relationship that Justin and Nana might not have happened if you didn’t share the same roof.

You don’t have to live in the same house to care for your people. Give them a call. Write them a letter.

Don’t wait.

Do it now.

You don’t have to, you get to.

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The evolution of the stairs

The stairs in the old house were a big deal.

The were dangerous and disgusting.

When we purchased the old house, the stairs were located just in side the left front door. Yep, two front doors. No wait!!! There were three front doors.

The left door, led to the stairs, the second floor and attic, apartments three and four.

The right door led to apartment number one, located on the first floor

The third front door led to apartment number two which was also located on the first floor

This is the view of the stairs as you entered the front door. This was of course taken after the plaster and lathe had been removed.

Here’s looking down

Just look at that weird little half/sideways step at the top. Can you say death trap?

This view would be from our now current dining room. Isn’t it justΒ  beautiful?

The old stairs were removed and reconfigured so that you did not have to enter the stairs as soon as you entered the front door.

For a few weeks, this is the way we got to the second and third floor.

image

The stairs were built offsite and put together on the front porch.

This day the main staircase was installed.

Then the entry level was installed along with banisters

Treads and banisters were stained, facers and spindles were painted

Looking pretty good!

img_2349

Walls were stenciled and decorating happened

You can read about the stencil wall here The wall that made me cry

Baby Jack came along and we began to think of stair safety.

I really REALLY REALLY didn’t want plastic baby gates.

So my super talented hubs built permanent baby gates that match the stairs.

As I look back on the progression of the stairs, I am completely amazed at the transformation and that we made it through.

Wow.

And we now have 1 front door

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Dear Jack

Your 9th month on this earth has been a full one and tomorrow you will be 10 months old!

Where has the time gone? We are already talking about your first birthday party.

You have learned how to crawl. When you want to go super fast you army crawl but most of the time you get up on your knees.

You love to meet Pops at the door when he comes home.

Patty Cake is a fan favorite. Along with So Big. DaDa, MaMa and Pop Pop can be understood. No BB yet but I’m patient.

When someone’s says “Oh No” you put your chubby little hands on you head. It’s the cutest thing ever.

Some mornings you come into bed with us

You like to hang from the canopy and we watch Sesame Street which is still your favorite.

You are so cute. You have 7 teeth but we are confident that many more are on the way. You are teething like crazy.

You like to sit in the cart at the store

You got a swing for Christmas and now we swing for hours on the front porch. Shirts are optional.

This month has been filled with ISR swimming lessons. It’s a huge commitment to take you every day but it’s so worth it.

Do you like it?

Not even a little. You cry everyday.

It always help to have Daddy to hold you after swimming too.

It’s hard to watch you be so unhappy but it’s important for you to learn because Pops and BB are putting a pool this month and we are going to have so much fun this summer.

You are climbing everywhere. You are learning to get up and down the steps on the front porch and Pops has been working on the gates for the stairs inside. We are getting ready for you to be walking soon.

BB’s windows will never be the same but who cares when here is a sweet baby boy kissing her through the window.

Uncle Kyle came for Mommy’s birthday and we had birthday breakfast. You love when Uncle Kyle comes to visit.

I could not love you more.

Love,

BB

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Filling the void

I have been feeling a little lost.

Do you ever feel like you have forgotten your purpose?

Do you wonder where the weeks go or even the days. Time speeds by so fast and at the same time it drags like nobody’s business.

I’ve tried to write blog posts but I just can’t seem to find the words.

I’ve worked on projects but I can’t seem to finish anything.

Start one thing and stop.

Start something else and stop.

Almost 6 months ago, my friend left and needs to be gone for an extended amount of time.

6 weeks ago my other friend took a job and went away.

Now I have plenty of friends so I’m not alone for goodness sake. But these two are my girls.

For months prior to them leaving I whined. Yes I whined. I didn’t want things to change. I liked it just like it was.

I spoke of replacing them and moving on. Yeah….that’s not going to happen.

I spoke of filling the void of their departures with so many things.

So many things.

2 months ago my dad went to heaven.

Weeks after he left, I had an epiphany. The reason why I couldn’t figure out how to fill the void was because I wasn’t supposed to.

I was to be still. I needed to fill my time with healing and serenity. I needed time to breathe and learn how to live without Dad. This will not happen quickly but it will happen.

I needed to fill my days with peace and contentment. Days spent with Mom and my precious Jack that fills my heart when the sadness wants to take over. Evenings with Steve rocking on the front porch eating ice cream or cuddled up watching a movie. Neighborhood walks with the family and dinner with friends Weekends full of a lot or nothing at all.

All this to say, I didn’t need to find a replacement for my friends. God already knew what I needed, exactly when I needed it.

I wish that I wasn’t so impatient.

Maybe I wouldn’t have whined.

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33 years

Thirty three years ago today.

We said I do.

We celebrated with our family and friends.

It seems like a lifetime and sometimes it seems like a couple years ago.

I was a twenty year old girl with stars in her eyes.

I’m a fifty three year old girl still with stars in her eyes.

This past year our baby girl gave us our first grand baby. I watch as you love that baby boy with so much joy.

I watch you love with the same love you have shown me all these years.

It’s been a hard year full of loves and losses.

I forever feel safe and cared for. You make me better.

The years only get better.

I have loved you the last 33 years and will love you for the next 33 years.

We’ve got this.

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